same old same old....

day hospital appt today. today the nurse helped us put how tim feels in perspective...he feels like he does about 2 weeks after chemo (pretty crappy) and he just keeps repeating that week over and over and over again. we are at 30-some days post-chemo and should be getting another round on thursday but tims body has just not recovered enough yet.

they are postponing the next round for at least another week or so...more to follow on that a bit later.

i work the next two days so i probably will not be updating too much between now and thursday. the kids have us running here and there...they are really enjoying their summer so far...we are so proud of them...they are having to bend a little because of how tim is feeling and all his appts and my work schedule...they have been real troopers!!

thanks go out again to the "guys" that came back tonight to lay the mulch around our house...we are looking GOOD!!! i never could have done all that they have done for us...thank you thank you thank you.

well...gotta go finish up a hundred or so meatballs and make a double batch of fudge...a very very good friend lost her father this week and the best way i know how to help is to cook!!!

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

decent couple of days

it is friday night and all is well. we are still going in to the day hospital every 48 hours for fluids and bloodwork (and potassium more recently). he still has his normal issues but nothing new and that is good.

not much to comment on...tim is supposed to get his 6th round of chemo next thursday (july 3rd) but we have asked for a consult with the doctor to discuss other options or at the very least a delayed start. he has not recovered fully from the last round yet and he is not ready to go back in for another quite yet. stay tuned for more on that later next week.

nothing much planned for the weekend...hope you all have a nice weekend.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

got a lot worse...

before getting better. last night (monday into tuesday) was a horrible night. tim started with a fever and we were up until about 4:30am taking temps every half hour. each half hour we were trying to decide if this is when we should get in the car and head to hershey...he peaked at about 2am and begged me not to call the oncology fellow. at 3am he had leveled off a little but still higher than we were supposed to be without calling. at about 10am his fever broke...and we went to our 1pm day hospital appt fever-free.

they started him on another antibiotic and drew blood cultures and gave him some fliuds and lectured us for not calling...but he was able to come home and that made him happy. he seems a little better tonight and is so glad to be home. (that was a close one).

this will be short...i didn't get much (if any) sleep last night and i have to be to work in about 7 hours...i should try to catch a nap. kelsey leaves in the early morning for creation. keep her in your prayers. the kids have been through quite a bit this last round and she could really use a nice relaxing and refreshing week away.

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

the weekend is over...

...it was a tough one.

on the positive side tim and the girls had a BLAST at our niece's graduation party...CONGRATS LINDZ. (sorry i had to work and couldn't make it up). i heard there was one wicked soccer game.

tim did well for most of the party but then towards the end things got a bit rough...he was able to make it home (compliments of megan being able to drive home from millville) but he certainly had a rought night and shakey sunday. he was running a low-grade fever and had a sore throat and chills and just feeling plain crappy.

he spent sunday afternoon at the day hospital (thanks for the ride david) getting juiced up...they are guessing that it is just a viral thing that will run its course...we hope so.

our heart-felt thanks go out to the "guys" that came by our house the last couple of days and did some amazing out-side work. i have been able to keep up with the little stuff on the outside of the house but i have to admit there are some things that are a bit outside my range of expertise...like crawling around on the roof and drilling holes in cement. i am not even sure i know all that they did, but i do know that tim and i are so thankful to a group of men that would take part of their busy week to come and help us out. i know that they cleaned out the rain gutters and changed flood lights on the roof. at one point i saw someone sweeping debris off my roof. (not something on MY to-do list this week--my new dyson STAYS IN THE HOUSE). pulling weeds and trimming back vines. replacing plastic covers for the basement window wells. it brings tears to my eyes just thinking about how blessed we have been...to my knowledge this was not something we requested...this was a group of men who wanted to do something, saw a need and just came and did it...amazing. (and i hear that they are not quite done yet...they are coming back to finish up some other stuff)

even though things are not always the best around here...and this was certainly a rough weekend for tim...tonight i went to sleep just thanking GOD for all his many blessings and for all our awesome friends and co-workers and neighbors and the many many other people we come in contact with on a daily basis. it is certainly our huge support system that gets us through on a day to day somewhat sane level. we could not do it alone...thanks to all.

have a great day.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

greetings...

we can't believe how quickly JUNE is flying by. we are now about 3 weeks past chemo #5 which puts us closer to 6 than 5 and that is not a pleasant thought!!! tim is having a MUCH better week. he still gets really tired and he still needs to go to the hospital every 48 hours for transfusion support and fluids but overall he is "feeling" much better.

i am letting him drive a little and that is good for us all.

he was laughing at me this morning because i was excited to open my new toy. because of a VERY VERY generous pepsi fund-raiser i was able to get my "dream" gadget...a dyson vacuum cleaner. (how pathethic is that!!!) we have gone through about 3 sweepers since tim got sick and i had about enough of those cheap sweepers but couldn't ever afford to splurge on a good one. everytime my dad or brother were down they were ripping apart my sweeper and trying to get it to work. we picked out the asthma/allergy one in hopes that it will help with keeping the dust down especially during tims neutrapenic phases. i can hardly wait to vacuum!!! i told the kids they had better keep their socks picked up...and just so you know...i will think of our pepsi family every time i get out that dyson-THANK YOU SO MUCH. (oh...and we also have bought some pretty decent "drugs" for tim-now we are BOTH happy)

we have been so blessed.

romans 12:12 says "rejoice in hope, be patient in suffering, persevere in prayer".

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

tired...

as tims white counts come up his red counts go down.

his white cells help with infection and stuff
his red cells give him the energy he needs to function

today he will probably need blood and platelets. he has a full day today.

blood work at the day hospital at 9am so they can get all the stuff he needs ready
his uncles viewing at 10am
his uncles funeral at noon
back to day hospital at 2pm for blood and platelet transfusion

i am leaving for work now...and will hopefully meet up with him this afternoon at the funeral. his dad is down and is helping us out today. keep our family in your prayers today...a death in the family is a sad time always but a death in this family involving cancer has the kids full of questions. lots of the questions i don't have answers for...pray for peace.

gotta get going...

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

HAPPY FATHERS DAY...

we are glad to say we have made it to another fathers day...i told tim that it is only fair that if we spend every mothers day and all my birthdays at the hospital we might as well spend fathers day there too!!!

things are going pretty well...he is feeling more human every day and he is eating much better. today we anticipate needing platelets and possibly red cells too. a bag of fluids is always expected.

then after that we hope to come home and gather all the kids and have a cook-out. it is a rare occasion that we are ALL together for a night-time meal. it should be nice.

on a sad note...for those of you who know that tims uncle was sick and recently found out he was full of cancer...his suffering is over and he passed away on friday morning. (this was freds younger brother). keep his family in your prayers. he was a good man and will be missed.

well...gotta get the gang moving for church.

have a wonderful day.

tim and tammy

we are home...

...and i am tired.

tim is doing pretty good. a little wired. a little pain. but glad to be home.

he has tomorrow off (hopefully) and his dad and sister are coming down. i have to work.

he goes back to the day hospital on friday. i have to work. (i think megan can take him in for his appt...she doesn't know that yet...this should be interesting).

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

ps...thanks for the visit today dd. nice to see you.

444

this is the number of times i have sat down in front of this computer to share a portion of our lives with our friends.

this has been one interesting week to say the least...our heartfelt thanks go out to all who have called and offered support and have prayed. tim is showing some signs of improvement and is begging the doctors to come home.

he is still on the morphine pump and the nutritional IV and all his medications are being given IV and probably needs platelets and blood...but he wants to come home. so...as long as he can stay fever-free during the night and he can eat (he had some french fries that he was able to keep down last night) they will consider sending him home wednesday.

just between you and me i was hoping they kept him until friday because i have to work on thursday and friday...but i know how much he hates it in there so i am not going to argue...but please keep praying.

i know he is feeling a bit better today but he has 7 things hanging from his IV pole...he will not have the IV pole when he comes home. we will be having to travel back and forth to the day hospital for fluids and transfusion support. each day that goes by will get a little better because his white cell counts are recovering...at least the mouth sores and the ulcers will get better. he will probably need to get fluids and blood and platelets for the next couple of weeks.

please keep our family on the top of your prayer list...this will be the first week of having to juggle my work with tim not feeling well plus 3 teenagers home for the summer. tim is used to having my undivided attention for at least 8 hours during the day and now things will be a little different...pray for peace!!! and pray that i don't get stretched too far that i snap.

thanks for checking in

(tim and) tammy

hard to describe...

the poor guy is suffering big time.

even with the morphine pump he is still in a lot of pain and discomfort...one of the nurses said if she were him she would ask for general anaesthesia ? until wednesday or so...

they have started him on a cocktail of medication to cover all the bases...anti-bacterial and anti-fungal and anti-viral. they have him on the constant morphine for the pain but when he tries to give himself more morphine for the pain he gets sick to his stomach...kinda a catch-22 situation.

at around 8pm they were going to come in and start him on a nutritional supplement through his IV...pray that he tolerates this better than he did last time. (during his post-transplant time he had the TPN and it was not a very pleasant experience...his labs got all messed up and they couldn't regulate his blood sugar very well...he ended up on insulin and it was pretty nasty stuff).

we are hoping that as his counts start to recover he will start to have some relief. i didn't hear what his counts were today but i predict that he is about due for platelets and possibly some red blood cells soon too. he has been running a fever in the evenings. the poor guy is really a mess.

well...i am going to lay back down and try to sleep. i was just laying awake praying that he was having a decent night and thought i would shoot out an undate...i am worried about him and feel so helpless. sometimes it is even hard to pray...

thanks for checking in

(tim and) tammy

6131

...that is tims room number tonight.

we had to go back into the hospital again for more "relief" and this time they did not let him go home. he was very upset but i was sort of relieved (don't tell).

as the night progressed he ended up with a PCA pump which allows him to self-dose his morphine as needed. he told me he was hitting the little button quite often. they are giving him all his drugs through his IV so he doesn't have to try and swallow them. plus...around 10pm he broke out with a fever. chances are pretty good that i would have had to take him in the middle of the night anyway...i am glad he is in there.

rough week.

thanks for checking in

(tim and) tammy

still bad...

i had to take him in yesterday for more fluids and they also gave him:

IV morphine
IV zofran (for nausea)
IV steriods
IV protonix (for stomach)
IV morphine (again)

today we go back in for more fluids and stuff plus his platelets are now an 18 so they will have a dose ready when we get there. his mouth is filling up with ulcers as his counts are dropping. he is very weak and run-down...keep praying.

his biggest concern is that he will get a fever...we don't want any fevers...that is just about the only thing that will land him in the hospital so he is praying everyday that he will not get a fever.

he can't wait to get outside in this heat but i am afraid that he is not going to do as well as he thinks once he gets out there...i was out at 6am and it was pretty nasty then.

try and stay COOL

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

really rough day...

i woke up to tim being sick to his stomach and from the looks of it i will be going to bed to tim being sick to his stomach. (if we get to bed)

each round of chemo seems to get a bit worse...this day is one that he will want to forget and never repeat. i wasn't really sure i was going to be able to get him to the day hospital...we had to pull over once (he was sick) and even once we were there it was a LONG trip to the 6th floor. we got there and there was NO BED...all the spots were full...he must have really looked bad because another patient gave up his bed for tim and just took a chair. (thank you sir).

they took one look at him and started the ball rolling...soon he had a bed and a blanket and his labs drawn and some IV fluids running and some IV zofran for his stomach and some IV morphine for the pain and some IV dextrose for his low blood sugar. we are so blessed to have such a wonderful nursing staff that are actually concerned and so compassionate. they have gotten to know tim so well and feel so bad when he has days like this. the one nurse just kept saying she just wanted to hug him and make him feel better...i wouldn't squeeze too tight today!!!

they had him feeling somewhat human again but it really was just a temporary fix...tonight he is pretty crappy again. he is so uncomfortable and hurts all over...but he can't take anything by mouth without getting sick. we are not due back until saturday at noon...but if needed we can go in tomorrow for another quick fix. he has lost 8 pounds in about 4 days and is still dropping. his platelets are down to a 28 so he will automatically get a dose on saturday.

hoping for a better day tomorrow.

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

i tryed...

...to sneak past another birthday but i guess i got caught.

thanks to all who keep much better track of peoples birthdays than i do...i am now officially over half way to 90...yippie.

tim is hanging in there. the chemo makes him very WIRED...he sits...he stands...he paces...he wants to eat...he wants to go for a ride...he paces some more...hopefully this will settle down in a couple of days. he has the HICCUPS again. (not just the little annoying hiccups) these are the hard hiccups that can (and have) made him sick. his esophagus is a mess again. food and drink gets caught half way down...and it causes him lots of pain and discomfort. but tim is hanging in there.

i HATE this week. in addition to tim being post-chemo, the kids are doing the cramming for finals thing...plus we just found out that tims uncle (freds brother-from hershey) who we thought was just battling diabetes actually is filled with cancer. he is in the med center also and every chance we get we are going in to visit with him (very sad). there is really nothing they can do for him except keep him comfortable. (pray for this family). he is a good man and has been so supportive of our family these past couple of years...always checking up on us and worried about tim (and still is)...a good man.

on a positive note...i guess...we got to visit with tims cousin yesterday. she is slightly older than tim and just finishing up chemo treatment and surgery for breast cancer...then she is off to radiation land. (yes...when tim started this whole cancer thing a few years back...none of this other stuff was happening). we thought we were unique...how sad that we are becoming the norm. there are SO MANY families hit with this cancer stuff. i feel for them all.

so...i spent my birthday with a trip to see uncle rich (dealing with cancer) and a short visit with donna (dealing with cancer) and a trip to the day hospital with tim (dealing with cancer)...i was starting to feel guilty having so much hair!!! and tim wonders why when i came home i wanted to get outside and mow the grass!!!! last night i think i could have mowed the whole block!!!

well...not much more to say.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

ps...to the lab crew at BHC...thank you again. (it brought tears to my eyes...i probably would have cryed but i was driving). i went home and ate a s'more.

we are home again...

in on friday early...out on sunday late

amazing what a transformation three days of chemo can make on a man. sunday was rough...he had gotten a bad case of the hiccupps and that had his stomach pretty messed up...it was a rough day.

he was roaming around last night during the night but i do not believe he was sick to his stomach any more last night. hopefully today will be a little bit better day. we are home today and back to the hospital tuesday for more fluids and a shot. pray for him this week...the first week post-chemo can be really intense. his body really takes a beating.

kids have their finals this week...pretty routine for my 11th grader...pretty scary for my 9th graders. this first year of having finals (that really count) is a bit nerve-racking. we have a neighbor that taught them in elementarty school and he is coming over quite often and helping them study for their algebra final...it has been a huge stress-reliever. he calls it trampoline algebra...a little math and a little fun.

last day of school is this friday.

fall sports practice starts next tuesday. nice they gave them a day off.

well...gotta get going...between working and spending so much time with tim this weekend my house could use a little TLC. (ok..maybe a lot)

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy