thosewhowait

Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

Saturday, June 30, 2007

crazy friday...

due to the insanity of my friday i was unable to post an update so today will have to cover both days.

i was woken up friday morning my one twin telling me that the other twin was sick and going to the first aid medic station and that i was to come get her. so off i headed to mt union, pa. knowing only that she had a bad headache, fever, severe left side pain and was on a stretcher...

to make a long story a bit shorter...i found her in the midst of 75,000 muddy people and brought (ashley) home to our family doctor to find out she has a kidney infection but that they can not rule out a kidney stone also. so after more pain meds and a very very long nap and some favorite foods she seems a bit better today. the fever is gone but the headache and left side pain (more of an ache today) is still lingering a bit.

tim is bumming because he needs to stay in the hospital until at least monday...that is when they are hoping to re-insert his central line. he was sick again last night on his supper...

well, i am off to the hospital to see tim...

thanks for checking in.

(tim and) tammy

Thursday, June 28, 2007

a better day...

the good news is that the bone marrow (preliminary) report came back as negative-meaning that they didn't find any lymphoma cells in the marrow.

the not so good news is that tim has another STAPH infection (which was the cause of the fever, chills, aches). they think the cause of the infection was his PICC line...that is the central line in his arm that he gets blood drawn from and IV's given. they had to REMOVE the PICC line today and put in a regular IV site for him to get his medication. they tell us that he will have to be on the IV antibiotics for a couple of weeks and that we should be able to have another central line put in early next week.

they have decided to hold the steroids for a bit.

he was able to eat a little tonight and keep it down. his spirits are a bit better although we still have room for improvement.

hopefully we will get him home in a couple of days...

thanks for checking in.

(tim and) tammy

a long day...

well, here goes.

on tuesday tim had a really bad day...he was sick to his stomach, running a fever, had chills, very achey, and just plain miserable.

on wednesday tim still wasn't feeling very well when we got to the doctors appt. because he was running a temperature all day tuesday and had such a sudden onset of symptoms his doctor decided to admit him to the hospital (tim was less than thrilled but really didn't have the energy to argue).

so we went from the two hours or so in the clinic to the four hours or so in the day hospital to the finally getting a bed on 6 east. it was about 8pm when we saw 3 different doctors and a multitude of nurses.

so, he is there and i am here.

what are we going to do???

1. for the fever we are going to assume that he has an infection of some sort that just hasn't surfaced yet and start him on multiple IV antibiotics.

2. incase it is not an infection and it is a sign of GVHD (graft vs host disease) we are going to pump him full of steroids which should also improve the stomach issues. (but cause him a lot of grief-he hates those steroids)

3. and because of the sudden onset of the fever and bone/muscle aches we are going to do a bone marrow biopsy in the morning to make sure that this is not the lymphoma rapidly spreading through his bones.

4. pray that it is the first one or the second one.

in order for them to get tim to agree to stay they told him that he would only be in for 48 hours...the last time they told us that i think we were in for 21 days. one day at a time.

i will update when i can.

thanks for checking in.

(tim and ) tammy

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

good morning

this will be my last blog until wednesday late afternoon/evening...things are holding steady although tims stomach is MORE upset than usual. he is sick again this morning...bummer.

we go to the day hospital this morning for lab work and fluids and stuff. tomorrow is our actual oncology appt with dr rybka. pray that he is given the wisdom to calm tims nerves and the wisdom to know which direction to proceed with this stuff. tim has been very uptight about this appt...he does not want them to tell him that he needs more chemo...not that i could blame him especially the way he has been so sick the last month or so.

the twins leave for creation at 6am tomorrow morning. megan is still plugging away with work and field hockey...i think she is planning a road trip to berwick one of these weekends...we miss the local carnivals and the homemade ice cream.

have a great day

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

Monday, June 25, 2007

off to work today...

yes, tim has the day off today and i am going to go and pick up a few hours at work. he is feeling about the same...stomach is goofy and he is very tired. we are back to the day hospital tomorrow and off to see "the man" on wednesday (hopefully we will be pointed in some direction on wednesday).

the twins are off to hersheypark with the church youth group and megan and i are off to work. my parents are coming down today to hang out with tim and work out in the yard a bit...not that we have much green grass but i think dad is going to trim the bushes and stuff...

that is about all for now...the college world series is over, the mets won and the yankees and braves lost. (i think). when does football start...i like football better than baseball...they play too many games in baseball.

gotta go.

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

Sunday, June 24, 2007

the weekend is half over...

and things are about the same. tim is still hanging in there...his stomach is still a mess, but he has been able to keep some food and drink down. they tried to give us an extra day off but we failed miserably. his blood counts showed that he can't have that extra day yet...his kidneys NEED the fluids so we are back into the day hospital this morning.

i think i have met a personal record with the number of different sports watched in one day...we started off the day with the triple crown polo match (this was a first for me) then we moved on to womans golf followed by men's beach volleyball. major league baseball (those poor yankees) was next then we watched some indoor arena football before the college world series game started!!!! in between all this we catch some highlights of lacrosse and nascar then i look out my back window and i see my kids playing field hockey...i think we need to get out of the house a bit more often.

well, that is about all i have for now...i couldn't sleep so i thought i would catch some sports center highlights...kidding!!!

hope you can all get to church somewhere today...

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

Friday, June 22, 2007

off to hershey again...

the twins come home from camp this morning. my poor washing machine...its mini-vacation is over.

tim has a 10am appt this morning for more blood work and fluids and stuff. his dad came down yesterday to visit while i went to work. then tim thought he was good to go out to eat...but that lasted about 12 minutes in the restaurant until he was sick to his stomach. so fred and i finished up our dinners and we got tims "to go". this stomach thing is turning into a real annoyance...i really think it is time that they address it more aggressively. he needs to be able to eat and keep food and drink down. he doesn't seem to want them to do any more tests...i am not sure why...it could be that he doesn't want them to find anything else wrong or he is just plain old tired of all the poking and prodding. i guess i don't blame him either way.

well, he is glad the kids are coming home for a few days...i think he likes the noise and chatter more than the quiet...we have watched the owls and the anteaters and the beavers and who know what other college team play baseball. looks like we get a day off today before the championship series starts tomorrow. the games have been interesting but the announcers can get very repetitive...i think i know every home town, every occupation, every MLB draft pick of every team by now, how many siblings, if they have pets, the grandparents names... i need a day off!!!

enjoy your day.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Thursday, June 21, 2007

a blessing...

most of the time when you think of a "blessing" it is used in the context of a noun...but today i am using the word as a verb: to confer prosperity or happiness on

i love to go to bible.com and look up verses occasionally based on key words. this morning i was wandering around the word PROVIDE. did you know that the word provide is found 101 times in the NIV of the bible??

many of you out there know where this blog entry is heading...mostly because you have been instrumental in being part of our PROVISION and BLESSING. i know for a fact that there are multitudes of people that are praying for tim to be well. but i am also aware that there must be multitudes of people that are praying for tim (and family) to be provided for...

i have grown up belonging to what i would consider a family that not only knew how to bless others but also a family that loved to bless others...and i must admit that is the "side" that i prefer to be on...the side that does the blessing...BUT circumstances have changed and now i am on the receiving side and although i am not thrilled about being here...it is what it is.

i have been so humbled. i know that God has promised to provide all our needs and yet there are times that i still worry...perhaps in the middle of this trial He is trying to teach us something about faith and trust and turning everything over to Him. tim and i were brought to tears recently over the huge display of love poured out on our family...we wish there was a way to express the gratitude that we feel towards everyone who has blessed this family.

we thank you all:

the ones who blessed us financially to be able to send our kids to church camp
the ones who blessed us with providing transportation for the kids
the ones who blessed us with food delivered right to our door
the ones who blessed us with gift cards to go out to dinner or a movie
the ones who blessed us with gift cards to buy groceries
the ones who blessed us with gift cards to buy gas
the ones who blessed us with gift cards to buy coffee (those are mine)
the ones who blessed us with money to pay for prescriptions
the ones who blessed us with showers of cards
the ones who blessed us with showers of prayers
the ones who blessed us with a phone call or a hug
the ones who blessed us with just being a friend
the ones who blessed...

as you can see...a thank you hardly seems enough, but right now that is all we have. we pray that someday everyone who has been part of our world would be blessed ten-fold.

what more can i say...have a great day

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

mid-week update

well, i think we both survived me working a few hours yesterday. after being off for about 6 weeks i was a little rusty but it seemed to all come back to me once i got going. tim said he "missed me" but he did OK.

that was quite a storm we had last evening...the twins are at church camp in the carlisle mountains and i guess they lost power for a while. i love electrical storms but unfortunately one of the three kids does not share my enthusiasm...ashley was a little freaked out last night-but she survived.

college world series is pretty much what we are doing in the afternoon and evenings...the other night it was the 7th inning of one of the games and we decided to run out and get a bit to eat. we got back and the game was still on!!!! it was a marathon game-over 5 hours to play a baseball game! thats nuts.

have a great day today.

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

wish us luck...

...my first day back to work and tims first afternoon alone.

i think we are both a little uptight about it. (kinda like sending your child off to kindergarten...you are nervous for them but you have to eventually leave them)

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Monday, June 18, 2007

its another monday

we had a really good saturday and a decent sunday...i think that if we have a really good day that tim is able to get out a bit it seems that the next day is always a little worse...he was wiped out on sunday. he pretty much just sat around and watched sports...baseball world series, nascar, and the US open. (now that is a full day right there).

we had a hospital appt sunday morning and on the way home i snuck him into our church to hear megan sing...we made it just in time...she did a wonderful job. the song she picked to sing was "how can i keep from singing" by chris tomlin and it pretty much said it all:



"How Can I Keep From Singing"

There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring

And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives

And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give

I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne



thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Saturday, June 16, 2007

saturday update...

tim is feeling pretty good going into this fathers day weekend. he was able to make it to kelseys softball game last night and went another whole day without being sick to his stomach. we have a graduation party to go to later on today and hopefully he is going to make an appearance there.

we are back to the day hospital tomorrow morning. his labs are holding up pretty good. our top priority right now is keeping food down and trying to drink more. (and stay OUT of the sun).

i am going to try to pick up some hours at work this next week. because of his multiple trips to the day hospital and his waves of nausea and his line care and his medication and his daily injections and making him eat and drink and not to mention his mental status at times and the fact that we have three teenage daughters needing to be here and there ...it has been difficult for me to work. they have been very gracious in allowing me to flex my hours...i am going to try to work on tuesday. i will take him to the hospital appt at 10am and then i will go down to work from 10:30am-4:00pm. we have arranged for one of the MANY pepsi volunteers to come and pick him up when he is done and take him home. pray that we will have a smooth transition into me going back to work...he is a little uptight about not being with me 24/7. i am going to start back slowly and see what happens. (i am only scheduled for 2 partial days this week).

the crew that i work with (both in the lab and in the nursing dept) have been wonderful with donating their hard earned time to me so that i can "loaf" around this summer...i still have some time left that i can be off but i am hoping to stretch it a bit by working some hours each week. wish me luck...

well, have a wonderful weekend...

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Friday, June 15, 2007

not much to tell...

...back to the day hospital this morning.

tim had a decent day yesterday. he ate pretty good and was able to keep his food and pills down. his energy level is still pretty low so we basically sit around and watch sports on TV all day. kelsey has a softball game tonight...hopefully he will feel good enough to catch some of it. i need to find stuff that will motivate him to get off the couch. i actually like the days we have to go to the hospital because it makes him get up and moving but i guess i really have NO IDEA how wiped out he must feel. small steps.

thanks for checking in...

enjoy your day.

tim and tammy

Thursday, June 14, 2007

another day off...

we are home today. i am a little surprised that they gave us today off...he is back to being sick to his stomach again. yesterday once at the hospital and again at home in the evening. he is eating breakfast right now with his bowl by his side. he is struggling a bit this morning. they have him back on the morphine for the pain. he is not happy about this...but they are concerned that the increase in pain could be due to tumor growth and not withdrawl...so we have to settle things down a bit so they can monitor his pain level better. they just are not quite sure what to do with him yet...so we wait.

his dad is coming down for a visit today. he brings us Dalo's pizza from a local berwick bakery...the kids haven't found any harrisburg pizza that they like better than this.

doubtful we will have too much on our plate today...meg is at hersheypark with some friends...the twins are outside "hangin" with some of their friends...my big plans are to hit the grocery store.

thanks for checking in...

tim and tammy

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

i wish...

...that i could say that our day off was wonderful but i can't.

because tim is doing so well they have decided that it is time to wean him off his pain meds...we had started this process last week and because of the length of time that he has been on the morphine we have had to cut back slowly. perhaps we didn't go slow enough...he has been extremely uncomfortable all day yesterday and throughout the night tonight. i just gave him some more tylenol with codeine to try to take the edge off. (i guess the morphine was doing more than we thought).

when i look up morphine withdrawl symptoms on-line i can see many similarities to how tim has felt in the last 24 hours or so...which has been pretty crappy. we are hoping that this is all we are dealing with and in another day or so he will be feeling better.

we go back to the hospital this morning at 10am. i am going to try and get a little more sleep before then.


thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Monday, June 11, 2007

we made it...

...we finally got a DAY OFF!!!!

i am updating the blog this evening because i REFUSE to get up early and update it tomorrow. tim had a good day hospital visit and made it through another day without being sick although i think the weekend really tired him out!!! he was in SLOW gear today and took a late afternoon nap but that is OK.

after 17 days in the hospital and 21 days straight going to the day hospital we are sleeping in tomorrow. my mini-van won't know what to do tomorrow morning. i am boycotting route 322 for a day. we go back at 10am wednesday morning to see how he did and then they will decide if we can be on a more relaxed schedule or at least get the home health people involved so we don't have to trek down there everyday.

hope you are having a great day.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

a really good weekend...

can you believe it...tim finally had a good couple of days. he still has the nausea throughout the day and night but he has not gotten sick since friday. he has been able to eat a little more and has really made an effort to drink too.

kelsey was in a soccer tournament this weekend and he was even able to make it to some of the games. (the team took first place and he was able to see the championship game). my parents came down for a visit on sunday-he really enjoyed that. we have gone to the day hospital every day for the last 20 days or so, but i feel a day off coming up. we have a 10am appt this morning. they have mentioned maybe being able to get home health in to give him the needed fluids and draw his daily labs...that would save us having to go to hershey every day. he still gets pretty tired and run down quickly...but that will come.

hope you all had a great weekend...we will keep you posted as the week goes on.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

greetings to the berwick hospital laboratory...and thanks...you guys are awesome!!!

Friday, June 08, 2007

holding pattern...

that is the best way that i can describe our appt today.

things we know:

tim has had two rounds of chemo
tim has had radiation therapy
tim has nausea and vomiting (source unknown)
tim is on lots of medication

things we don't know:

did the chemo and radiation put him remission?
are we going to do more chemo (some have gone through 6 rounds before they stop)?
are they going to do the DLI (boost of frozen cells)?

things we think:

wait and see if the nausea gets better with another three weeks...it could be GVH or it could be something else that no one has thought of yet.

continue with the day hospital appt.


it was kinda of a frustrating appt today. we were hoping for a decision one way or the other. now we just have to continue doing what we are doing and see what happens.

they are afraid that if the nausea is GVH that the boost of cells (DLI) will magnify the problem and they don't want that. so we wait...no medication changes...we just continue doing what we are doing.

well, that is it for now. i will update over the weekend if something changes, but if you don't see an update, then no changes have occurred.

stay out of this heat.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

a little better

thursday was a little better day. tim wasn't as sick as most days this week and we had a nice visit with his dad.

well, it is 6am and all is quiet in the dewalt house...very nice. we don't have to be at the hospital until noon today to get some fluids in the day hospital before we hike over to the clinic for the 2pm appt. because of him feeling so nauseous (?) he isn't drinking enough. when you don't drink enough your kidneys start to act up and that is what is happening now. very slowly his bloodwork is showing an increase in his kidney function levels so we are giving him more IV fluids when we are there to help balance things out.

look for tomorrows update for information on his appt today...a 2pm appt usually means being seen at about 4:30-ish if we are lucky. then off to kelseys softball game tonight...followed by 4 soccer games this weekend.

have a great weekend.

thanks for checking in

tim and tammy

Thursday, June 07, 2007

still the same...

not much changing around here. he was sick a couple of times yesterday again. we briefly talked with his doctor and he said he was going to go and study his last two months of medications and treatments and when we come in friday he will try to have a plan (both for the nausea and the cancer).

today is the kids last day of school. they are excited, although in about two weeks i will start hearing "i am bored" and "i miss my friends". we try to keep things going around here but sometimes it is hard. like for instance...tim decided yesterday that he wanted to ride along to go pick up the girls at the middle school. it should have been a quick half hour trip...there and back...but instead the bus was running very late because of a missing student (who they eventually found reading a book in the restroom???) so we had to sit for about 45 minutes waiting so our short little trip turn out to be about an hour and a half...and he got sick in the car on the way home. he doesn't always have any warning when he is going to get sick...sometimes it is after a wave of nausea that he can't fight off and other times it is just spontaneous...that puts a damper on our social life a bit!!!!

but like we keep on saying...better days are coming. i told someone once that 16 years ago i had wished he knew what it was like to have morning sickness all day and all night long like i did, but i really didn't mean it!!!! i guess i should be careful what i wish for...although i have also wished i would win the lottery...

well, gotta get the kiddos up.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

good morning...

this morning i would like to say a special HELLO to the guys and gals at the PEPSI plant. i hear that EVERY morning you check-in and knowing that we have such faithful friends interested in the day to day help us get through these long days. there are so many people who follow-up with tims progress on this blog that sometimes i feel guilty not having much to say...

but i don't have much to say. tim was sick yesterday (as usual). he was able to eat a little bit more yesterday...it seems that after he gets sick he is a little hungry so i take advantage of that. sometimes we are eating lunch at 3pm and a supper at 9pm but when he is hungry i try to feed him. last night he was eating cereal after 10pm while watching the girls college world series.

he is off 2 of his antibiotics so hopefully we will start to see a difference in how his stomach feels. no more IV's to hook up at home...that is a nice break. they hinted around yesterday that they may like to get us a day off soon...that would be nice. i think that if we were to have a day off and the kids didn't need mom's taxi service we would ride up to berwick for a quick visit. it has been a long time that we have been anywhere besides hershey. i think we could both use a change of scenery.

the twins are at hershey park for their 8th grade class trip. (that is quite a class that the girls are in...today i heard that approx 150 kids were not allowed to go because of suspensions and detentions and grades...that left just over 100 going). we are very proud of our girls and their ability to pick the "right" friends to hang with...they are a great group of kids. there is not one day that goes by that we don't pray for our kids and that they make "smart" choices when we are not around.

meg has three more finals...then back to work!!! her temp job called her and wants her to stay on for the summer...they really like her (no big surprise to me) and would like her to continue through the summer. ( this is good for mom too $$$ teenagers can be quite expensive to keep around)

well...gotta get tim moving.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

another day...

the kids are up and gone and we are off to the day hospital again. so far tims breakfast has stayed down. he actually got up on his own today...the first time in months...this must be a good sign.

not much to say today. we still have that doctors appt on friday afternoon.

have a great day.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Monday, June 04, 2007

last week of school...

...well, the kids are excited and i think that i am too. it has been another stressful year of dealing with all the normal teenage issues PLUS having a sick dad and a slightly irregular mom (although the mom issue has been around a long time). they deserve a great summer break!!!!

thanks to all the birthday wishes for me...yes another year has come and gone.

tim had a loong appt yesterday at the day hospital. we got there just before 9:30am and i don't think we were home before 4:00pm. he had to get his usual potassium and magnesium and fluids plus they transfused 2 units of red cells too. his stomach seemed a little better yesterday. they gave him some IV compazine as soon as we got there and that seemed to get him over a rough time in the morning.

had quite a bit of company yesterday and he seemed to do well. my parents were down and his dad was down and my brother and his wife were down. we consumed a wonderful maggie moo's ice cream cake...it was a nice evening.

thanks go off to all my taxi drivers this weekend...thanks to david for getting the kids to church and diane for getting them home (oh, by the way diane-you are fired!!!). we have had so many people helping out with transportation issues over the last few months...thank you all!!!!!

well, i have to get the kids moving.

thanks for checking in.

happy june.

tim and tammy

ps...it is 9am: the toast goes in and the toast comes out...it is going to be one of those days.

Saturday, June 02, 2007

post #250

can you believe it...250 times i have updated this blog!!!!

can you believe it...in the past 37 days we have had one day off.

he has been in the hospital as a patient 22 days.

he has been in the day hospital for transfusion support 14 days.

we are off to the hospital again today. there is a CMN community day and craft show today...it will be a mad-house.

megan and her field hockey team are having a car wash today (out on rte 22 by karns).

good news...tim is no longer "neutropenic". he still has to be careful, but no more mask and bizarre diet restrictions (not that he is really eating much anyway). he was sick again yesterday...each day we hope and pray for a no-nausea day.

well, hope you all enjoy the weekend.

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy

Friday, June 01, 2007

better days are coming...

not so good day yesterday...tim has 3 or 4 different times throughout the day that he was sick. and one time was while he was at the hospital receiving IV anti-nausea medication!!! i think we have just about exhausted all the different combinations of drugs...

i think it is time that they re-scan or at least do a scope to see what is going on down there. tim is just tired and doesn't want me to push the issue of any more tests but there comes a time when i need to pull rank i guess. even though we spend hours and hours a day at the hospital we don't actually see the doctor until june 8th. hopefully after yesterday the nurse notified the doctor and i won't have to intervene...i don't like being the bad guy.

well, today is the kids last FULL day of school...next week they get out early every day. i am looking forward to not having to get up at 5:30am every day for a few weeks...although i guess i will eventually have to go back to work. my work has been GREAT about me being off. i have received enough donations of time to have a couple more weeks off to deal with this stuff. (they have also collected $$$ and gift cards for the cafeteria and sheetz and starbucks...i work with a great gang-thank you thank you thank you)

tims work...well, there is not enough time or space to go into detail about that gang...they have gone above and beyond the call...some day we hope to be able to express our heartfelt graditude to EVERYONE who has blessed our family during this time!!!! being blessed like this once in a lifetime is totally awesome, but this is our second time round and we are having a tough time knowing what to say...i know those of you who know me find that hard to believe but it is true)

gotta get going...

thanks for checking in.

tim and tammy